Your House? It Ain’t The Hyatt

If your house was a hotel, how much could you charge for guest accommodations? According to a recent survey by, the average that Americans come up with is $149.

To which I say: c’mon!

Hey, I don’t want to be ungracious, but if I’m paying $149 a night, there are a few things I have to tell you.

First, your sleep sofa is uncomfortable and the spare sheets are musty. Your kids make too much noise, your dog (or cat) kept climbing on top of me and I could hear your spouse snoring from the master bedroom.

I don’t want to complain about the complimentary breakfast, but maybe an English muffin with the Frosted Flakes wouldn’t kill you? Housekeeping seemed a little lax, to be honest, and where the heck was the room service? The bar was understocked, the wireless network was too slow and you seem to have misplaced the indoor swimming pool.

Yeah, I’m pretty disappointed. I’m sure you’ll understand if I take home a few of your towels to make up for it.


One thought on “Your House? It Ain’t The Hyatt

  1. Gudrun

    wow, $149. That makes me really worried when I do pay that much for a room, what will I really be getting! There is no way I could get that much for our guest room setup – at the moment, we have to evict one of our children to the other child’s room if we have guests. If we evict my daughter, then the guest gets a nice, two twin bed set up. If we evict my son, then the poor guest has to sleep in a boy room, with boy smell! For $149, I am pretty sure they could stay at the Best Western down the street and have a much better experience….


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *