I like to think I’m an adventurous traveler but I try to avoid anything that might eat me. All sorts of predatory creatures fall into this category, but what I’m talking about here is mainly sharks. And grizzly bears.
See, I grew up here in New England, where shark attacks are quite rare. And don’t you believe otherwise just because "Jaws" was filmed on Martha’s Vineyard. That shark was a total fake. I saw the props at Universal Studios.
There may be some scientific theory to explain it, but I believe New England sharks simply don’t get a lot of opportunity to eat people because it’s too damned cold for humans to swim in the Atlantic off New England shores. The people-eating trend passed the sharks by, sort of the way sushi has never really made it in central Connecticut.
Still, "Jaws" scared a lot of people. One of my sisters refused to swim in the ocean for years after she saw it. My parents, knowing what a complete weenie I could be, wisely forebade me to see the movie, and so I continued swimming in the Atlantic until my lips turned blue.
That never took long, so by the time a shark figured out I might be worth eating, I was back on the beach.
Sure, I’ll swim in warmer waters. But I’m not taking my chances at any of those "shark-infested" beaches. If those sharks want some New England sushi, they can swim up here and get it.